CuteChoice > blonde jokes

How can you tell if a blonde has been using the computer?
There is white-out on the monitor.

How do you make a blonde's eyes twinkle?
Shine a flashlight in their ear.

What does a blonde owl say?
What, what?

Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence?
To see what was on the other side.

Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back?
From crawling across the street when the sign said "DON'T WALK".

Why did the blonde keep a coat hanger in her back seat?
In case she locks the keys in her car.

Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet?
So she wouldn't wake up the sleeping pills.

Why did the blonde drive into the ditch?
To turn the blinker off.

Why did the blonde try and steal a police car?
She saw "911" on the back and thought it was a Porsche.

What does a blond and a beer bottle have in common?
They're both empty from the neck up.

How do you get a blond out of a tree?
Wave .

What do peroxide blonds and black men have in common?
They both have black roots.

Why did the blonde get so excited after she finished her jigsaw puzzle in only 6 months?
Because on the box it said From 2-4 years.

A blonde is walking down the street with a pig under her arm. She passes a person who asks "Where did you get that?"
The pig says, "I won her in a raffle!"

A blonde ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces.
"Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces."

How do you confuse a blonde?
Ask her to alphabetize a bag of M&Ms.

Why does it work?
"Does 3 come before E or does it go between M and W?"

Why did the blonde call the welfare office?
She wanted to know how to cook food stamps!

Did you hear about the blond skydiver?
She missed the Earth!

Where do blondes go to meet their relatives?
The vegetable garden.

Did you hear about the blonde couple that were found frozen to death in their car at a drive-in movie theater?
They went to see "Closed for the Winter".

Why is the blonde's brain the size of a pea in the morning?
It swells at night. What did the blonde do

when she heard that 90% of accidents occur around the home?
She moved.

What's five miles long and has an IQ of forty?
A blonde parade.

Why is it okay for blondes to catch cold?
They don't have to worry about blowing their brains out.

What do you call four Blondes in a Volkswagon?
Far-from-thinkin.

What happened to the blonde tap dancer?
She slipped off and fell down the drain.

What did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios?
"Oh look! Donut seeds!"

What did the blonde name her pet zebra?
Spot.

What's a blonds' favourite rock group?
Air Supply.

Whats black and fuzzy and hangs from the ceiling?
A blond electrician.

Why are dumb blonde jokes so short?
So brunettes can remember them.

Did you hear about the blonde coyote?
Got stuck in a trap, chewed off three legs and was still stuck.

When is it legal to shoot a blonde in the head?
When you have a tire pump to reinflate it!

What is a blonde's favorite part of a gas station?
The Air Pump!

What goes VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH?
A blonde going through a flashing red light.

What is the definition of gross ignorance?
144 blondes.