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The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.
When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something
Many people quit looking for work when they find a job.
When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.
Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
Join the Army, meet interesting people, then kill them.
Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humor.
OK, so what's the speed of dark?
All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.
3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't.
Why is "abbreviation" such a long word?
Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice.
...every morning is the dawn of a new error.
.. Mental Floss prevents Moral Decay.
Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.
Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
I don't have a solution but I admire the problem.
If at first you DO succeed, try not to look astonished!
Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie!" till you can find a rock.
If things get any worse, I'll have to ask you to stop helping me.
Don't look back, they might be gaining on you.
Help Wanted: Telepath. You know where to apply.
Look out for #1. Don't step in #2 either.
Do witches run spell checkers?
What has four legs and an arm? A happy pit bull.
My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.
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