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Access denied--nah nani na nah nah!
Does fuzzy logic tickle?
All computers wait at the same speed.
Don't sweat the petty things, and don't pet the sweaty things.
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
One nice thing about egotists: They don't talk about other people.
To be intoxicated is to feel sophisticated but not be able to say it.
Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
The older you get, the better you realize you were.
I doubt, therefore I might be.
Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.
Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.
Women like silent men, they think they're listening.
Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
A fool and his money are soon partying.
Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at em?
If you're born again, do you have two bellybuttons?
If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry?
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
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